Sunday, July 27, 2008

Not well-read

There is a storm here in our little corner of blogland. We have lost one dear to our circle.

To be honest, I have a pretty tight little circle of blogs I read regularly. I see other peoples' blogrolls of daily reading, and I boggle at how they have the time to do all that reading. I think folks have picked up on my little circle, because whenever awards go around, I tend to bring up the same dozen blogs. I hunt and peck at other blogs, but when it comes down to it, I have my comfy dozen, those familiar comfy couches in virtual livingrooms, and there I take up my residence. I follow along those stories, think about those children, those parents, those families. Other blogs drift through, other faces, names, tales; but the focus remains on this one small circle.

Sometimes things reverberate through that little circle from those drifting names and faces. The reverberations of loss of one little boy is one of those. I wasn't particularly following Evan's story and life. I peeked in now and again, popped by when something caught the interest in some of the autism headlines sites I sometimes peruse. When I got the news from Niksmom that Evan was sick, I had to ask which blog he belonged to, I couldn't remember, I just had some connect that I had read some of his adventures.

But many of my little dozen were regular readers, followers of this family, profoundly impacted by the sudden loss. We may have never met each other, but we are friends and family all the same. I am terribly sorry that Vicki is going through this loss, I cannot imagine losing a child, but the pain must be... even the thought of it is overwhelming. What can I do from my little virtual corner than to send what hugs I can, do what I can to honor a child and a family who mean so much to so many? To put out that reminder, in my own way, that we are all precious, even people I don't really know, know only from glimpses of glimpses?

I also want to hug my little circle, who feel so much pain and very real grief in this loss.

We're thinking of all you guys: Vicki and her family, and our other blog families and friends who are hurting. Keep us informed of how we can help.


Niksmom said...

Thank you. THis means a lot. xoxo

Chaoticidealism said...

I'm not really sure what I ought to say about all this. I don't really feel the sort of empathy everyone seems to. I just wish it had not happened. People should live at least long enough to retire. There is a lot of wrongness in a death that is too early. It gives me the same feeling as polyester or 2+2=5, only much stronger. It's just... wrong. It shouldn't happen.

Could I maybe ask for advice here? I can't do anything, really. I'm so far away. Generally my response would be to make food or help clean the house. But over the Internet all you can do is say words, and I don't know which words comfort people the most. I've got a lot of stock words, "I'm so sorry", or "Is there anything I can do?" That's what you're supposed to say. But it really seems quite useless.

Joeymom said...

I recommend contributing to the memorial fund. I will also be adding the family to the church prayer circle. There is a memorial tomorrow (as of the writing of this comment) to send thoughts and flowers, and the family has chosen a charity for donations in lieu of flowers. There is also the photo memorial.

Check out the links in the post for more info on these possibilities.