Monday, April 14, 2008


Joey has been taking drumming lessons for a good long while now. They are supposed to be good for his bilateral coordination, and he was enchanted with drums and music when we started. Lately, we have been seriously considering discontinuing them.

First, the rules kinda got changed on us. The guy who was running the lessons and I had a kind of unspoken agreed understanding about how this was working with us- we paid week-to-week, instead of by the month, and we had some flexibility where if Joey was sick or having a particularly bad day, we could cancel without having to pay for the missed lesson (technically, we are supposed to pay and then have a "make up" lesson, but when would Joey be able to "make up" a lesson?) Now that guy is sick, and the fellow in his place wants us to pay for the whole month, and the lesson we missed when Joey was sick (even though the teacher has a very sick father and so asked us to please cancel if Joey is sick). I paid up, but it really makes these lessons expensive, and the new lack of flexibility means I really need to give it some thought about continuing.

On top of that, and far more relevant, Joey has been doing the "I don't wanna" dance. "I don't want go Mr. Shelby. No Mr. Shelby today." Joey has been increasingly sensitive to noise, so that we started using earplugs for the lessons- and that helped for a while, but now not so much. Today the drum was "scary". This is exactly the kind of shift in sensory trouble and attitude that I was worried about- why we had that week-to-week idea in the first place. He seems to perk up about halfway through the lesson. But is that enough? If this isn't fun, what's the point?

I'd wait it out until our other guy is back, but we're not sure when that will be, and time is short- I have to give two weeks' notice, and before I pay for another whole month of lessons Joey may not want- and that would be now. :P On the other hand, is Joey really not interested now, or is there something else going on? Has being sick knocked him for a bigger loop than anticipated, and he just wants to stay home for an afternoon, and Mondays are particularly tiring? Should I just try to juggle the appointments and find a different lesson day? It's not like I can just ask Joey and expect a direct answer to decide the matter.


bobbie said...

You have a difficult decision to make. I have no advice I'm afraid, but I can empathize, and pray you find the answer you need. So sad when someone new to a situation just doesn't get it - or refuses to see it.

kristi said...

I probably would have pulled my son out when the deal we made was changed. Good luck!

Stimey said...

First of all, I just want to say that you are a better mom than me for getting him drum lessons in the first place. :) (I would be the one who needed the earplugs.)

Is he the kind of kid who might benefit from taking a break from lessons for a couple of months and then might be happier about going back?